Love is passionate and deep and will drive you to do crazy things for each other. But loving a person, actually knowing all their faults, having sought out and being fully aware of everything that makes up their inner person, knowing the good and the bad, and still choosing to be with them – that's love. That's what you must have in order to experience the feeling of being one.
There was a girl, whom I have met and gotten to know intimately, and after a quantity of time have realized that I feel a very peculiar way when I am around her, or talking to her, or otherwise thinking about her. I have no clear explanation for what constitutes this feeling, I only know that it seems to be as unique and indescribable as other people have called “being in-love”. So, I must concede – I was in love. I consider myself an insanely lucky man to have found the woman I did, she fits me beautifully, and I feel that we were soul mates. Finally we took our love to the finest destination ever and we got married.
Life after marriage was full of new emotions, experiences, love, respect and responsibilities. I felt really comfortable with the shared life I had with my wife. There were definitely some shared roles and responsibilities like washing clothes, vacuuming and mobbing the floor and washing dishes after every meal. I also learned about respect and communication. We learned to speak and express ourselves. We did our best to share what our thoughts and feelings were. What I meant when I say respect is in the sense respect that she was also having her individual space and I used to respect her commitment and adjustments that she has made to be with me. Communication in the sense we shared with each other our thoughts, problems and challenges so we could better understand each other and learn to cope together. When we shared our life, we become closer too. However, along with sharing a life comes this AMAZING realization – you are sharing a life, you are ONE person, only together are you whole, and though you may not have been aware of it before, you are only a half – and like a puzzle, when together, the other part brings twice as much depth and meaning to both of you.
But after children, the bond not only became stronger but it was shared too. Emotions, love, responsibilities and care were shared with the children. The time that I used to spend solely with my wife was now shared with my kids. I used to be more with the kids than to help my wife in household stuff. The communication and sharing had become less as compared to before. So I thought my wife had a bit of insecurity and feeling that I may have forgotten my first love and was caring for kids more than her. There have been instances where my wife had complained that I every time think about kids and their likings but have forgotten her wish n likings. Now the free time and weekends have become a picnic or hobby classes for kids. Previously I used to bring my wife small gifts on every salary day but then it was changed to toys and books for the kids. This made my wife a bit depressed as we hardly spent time alone like one before children. I had never felt that my love for children has reduce my love and feelings for my wife who has given me the most wonderful gift I have ever received in my life-my children. So one day when kids were not there, we decided to sit and talk to solve this problem.
Finally then we mutually decide how to not let anyone of us feel neglected or insecure by putting the kids in the first place. I understood her worries and wishes to be with me the same way as like before. We decided to spend at least1 full day without kids just like we used to do before. I realized my ignorance for her and promised her never to repeat this ignorant mistake ever. Now we both are very happy as along with being with the kids, we spare valuable time with each other. For future too, with increasing level of work pressure and responsibilities for kids, we see the same level of feelings and love for each other. You should always balance life between kids and your wife so as she will never feel less loved or being cared of or neglected in your ignorance.
There was a girl, whom I have met and gotten to know intimately, and after a quantity of time have realized that I feel a very peculiar way when I am around her, or talking to her, or otherwise thinking about her. I have no clear explanation for what constitutes this feeling, I only know that it seems to be as unique and indescribable as other people have called “being in-love”. So, I must concede – I was in love. I consider myself an insanely lucky man to have found the woman I did, she fits me beautifully, and I feel that we were soul mates. Finally we took our love to the finest destination ever and we got married.
Life after marriage was full of new emotions, experiences, love, respect and responsibilities. I felt really comfortable with the shared life I had with my wife. There were definitely some shared roles and responsibilities like washing clothes, vacuuming and mobbing the floor and washing dishes after every meal. I also learned about respect and communication. We learned to speak and express ourselves. We did our best to share what our thoughts and feelings were. What I meant when I say respect is in the sense respect that she was also having her individual space and I used to respect her commitment and adjustments that she has made to be with me. Communication in the sense we shared with each other our thoughts, problems and challenges so we could better understand each other and learn to cope together. When we shared our life, we become closer too. However, along with sharing a life comes this AMAZING realization – you are sharing a life, you are ONE person, only together are you whole, and though you may not have been aware of it before, you are only a half – and like a puzzle, when together, the other part brings twice as much depth and meaning to both of you.
But after children, the bond not only became stronger but it was shared too. Emotions, love, responsibilities and care were shared with the children. The time that I used to spend solely with my wife was now shared with my kids. I used to be more with the kids than to help my wife in household stuff. The communication and sharing had become less as compared to before. So I thought my wife had a bit of insecurity and feeling that I may have forgotten my first love and was caring for kids more than her. There have been instances where my wife had complained that I every time think about kids and their likings but have forgotten her wish n likings. Now the free time and weekends have become a picnic or hobby classes for kids. Previously I used to bring my wife small gifts on every salary day but then it was changed to toys and books for the kids. This made my wife a bit depressed as we hardly spent time alone like one before children. I had never felt that my love for children has reduce my love and feelings for my wife who has given me the most wonderful gift I have ever received in my life-my children. So one day when kids were not there, we decided to sit and talk to solve this problem.
Finally then we mutually decide how to not let anyone of us feel neglected or insecure by putting the kids in the first place. I understood her worries and wishes to be with me the same way as like before. We decided to spend at least1 full day without kids just like we used to do before. I realized my ignorance for her and promised her never to repeat this ignorant mistake ever. Now we both are very happy as along with being with the kids, we spare valuable time with each other. For future too, with increasing level of work pressure and responsibilities for kids, we see the same level of feelings and love for each other. You should always balance life between kids and your wife so as she will never feel less loved or being cared of or neglected in your ignorance.
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